Galactic Times

VOLUME 1, ISSUE 3
Front Page

Death Sticks Harmful, Experts Warn

CORUSCANT - Death Sticks, the popular Cilona-extract, may be more harmful then previously thought according to a new study.
   Health experts say the small tubes of liquid -- usually red or blue -- are measurably detrimental to one's health.
   "This is not like red wine or steak, where one year it's good for you and the next it's bad. We have found empirical evidence that Death Sticks are extremely unhealthy, to put it mildly," said Coruscant doctor Almana Hanama.
  Relatively cheap, Death Sticks are usually easy to find for anyone looking to buy, and provide a fast fix to the user.
  "I wouldn't let my kids anywhere near these things," Hanama said.
Usually sold by slythmongers to club and party-goers, the sticks have been in the public eye for the past few years.
  "Yeah, I see them sold at my place," said Dexter Jettseter, owner of Dex's Diner. "I never thought too much of 'em. We get a few people trying to sell it to my customers, but they don't take away my business so I let them stay.
  Experts aren't sure if the Galactic Senate will act on these new findings.
  "The Death Stick lobby is pretty powerful," says Hanama. "We'll just have to keep doing our job and hope the Senate does theirs."

COMMENTARY: Is PodRacing a Sport?

TATOOINE - Podracing. Some say dangerous. Some say a joke. Ever since a nine-year-old won the Boonta Eve Classic, skeptics of the dangerous competition say it's more about the ships than the pilot's skill.

"If you're going to call podracing a sport, you might as well call piloting a B-Wing a sport," said Wuher, a Mos Eisley bartender and former podracing fan. "It used to be more about the skill, but the racers these days are just so suped-up, anyone can do it. Just look at that Skywalker kid."
  But proponents of the competition say there is still a lot of skill needed to win.
  "For one thing, there's no autopilot on these things. That's made sure by race officials. Secondly, we're dodging freakin' Tusken Raiders shooting at us," said Bozzie Baranta, podracer. "I'd like to see Banthaball players do that," he added.
  Whether it is a sport or not, Podracing continues to draw crowds to each event, and the amount of money exchanging hands after each race grows as well.
  Speaking through an interpretor, Jabba the Hut said "You show me a gambler, I'll show you a Podracing fan."

STARDATE 109.172.06

Ship Makes Kessel Run in Under 12 Parsecs

KESSEL - A feat usually known only among smugglers made it to the mainstream last week as the Millenium Falcon made the "Kessel Run" in under 12 parsecs. The previous record was 14 parsecs.
  The "run," as it is called, involves taking off from Kessel, usually with stolen spice, and hitting light speed as quickly as possible. Usually pilots travel at least 20 parsecs before making the jump to light speed, which makes the Falcon's jump all the more impressive.
  "Yeah, not bad I guess," said Han Solo, captain of the ship. "She can really fly."
  Owner of the vehicle, Lando Calrissian, said, "Sometimes Han pushes her hard. A little too hard for my taste. But that's Han. He shoots first and asks questions later."

Fourteenth Arrest Marks Record for Local Thug

MOS EISLEY - Ponda Baba, regular patron at Mos Eisley's popular Cantina bar, was put under arrest for harassment by police on Tuesday, making it a record 14 times.
  "He just won't keep to himself," said Police Chief Feevo Nihr. "He and his buddy just keep going up to random people and telling them they don't like them, trying to start a fight."
  The Cantina, usually a peaceful place, was marred by violence recently with the murder of Greedo, a well-known bounty hunter.
  Police say Baba is not a suspect in that crime.
  "This guy is pretty low-level. Mostly harmless," said Nihr. "But someday he's going to pick on the wrong person and lose an arm or something."

Study: Speeder Bikes May Hold Engineering Flaw

ENDOR - Although speederbikes seem to be a welcome change for Stormtroopers stationed on Endor, engineers for the Empire now say the bikes may have a critical engineering flaw.
  Speederbikes allow troops to cruise through the wooded forests of the planet, but now experts say that the stabalizing front of the vehicle is built with sub-standard metal that could easily be cut through with a light saber.
  "It would be like a warm knife through butter," said Plo Mardish, chief engineer on the bike.
   "It's not like we're expecting a lot of lightsabers to be cutting through these things- but if one sliced the front end off, the bike would just keep on going, except wildly in a circle. The driver would have no chance," he said.
  Senate officals haven't said whether more budget will be allocated to fixing the bikes.
  "We're also considering shortening the controls a bit just so if one of those pesky Ewoks got on, they couldn't be able to reach them. It would probably save the Ewok's life more than anything," he added.

Advance Made in Carbon Freezing Technology

DEATH STAR - Imperial researchers announced a breakthrough in carbon freezing technology, used in the containment of volatile Tibanna gas.
  "This new breakthrough will open up many doors for us. It will allow our economy to grow, definitely, being able to ship this stuff over longer distances," said Cloud City spokesperson Leebo Gantu.
   The new technology is much more stable than previous carbon freezing methods, according to Gantu.
   "Heck, we could freeze a person in this stuff now if we wanted to," he added.